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Personal Log #2/Action Post - A Week After Amnesia Event
[Spock is sitting on his bed and he stares at the journal which is currently residing on the desk across from him.
Spock had woken up this morning and knew he was alone in the house....his Captain was gone. And he knew that he had been taken... and Spock could feel that Captain Kirk was in pain...wherever he was.
Spock wondered at the futility of putting out a community-wide announcement to see if anyone had further information on Kirk's whereabouts. Spock was also rather disinclined to leave his house considering the damage he had inflicted during the bout of amnesia... he had not left the house in approximately 3.6 days. What if he had met someone he had 'assaulted'?
Spock puts his head down at that thought...he can recall his father's lectures on privacy and using telepathy on psy-null beings...these offenses were a severe violation and punishable in Vulcan society. If his home-planet still existed he would be outcast! The crimes he committed! It only proved that as a Vulcan, he was.... a poor example.
Spock abruptly gets up and starts to pace through the room. His meditation lately has left much to be desired, though it did resolve a rather significant issue. The link that he had forc...established with Mister Lupin was familial in nature and fairly easy to control. Lupin would not have to be burdened with this as long as Spock was able to keep his shields in place.
But the meditation itself? The effects from the physical contact had left Spock at mental loose ends. The memories and emotional transference...well, it left him emotionally compromised, and the nature of the contact made it rather difficult to resolve.
Spock's pacing slowed as he considered the other encounters he had...he was a disgrace... the things that happened, the beings he took advantage of... and he will never be able to look at the couch the same again.
He put his head in his hands and sat back down on the bed...there had to be a logical resolution to this...perhaps he needed, as they say, a 'change in scenery'. He looks up and glares a little at the journal. His frustration levels begin to rise once more.
.....everything....everything about Spock has been 'unraveling' since landing in Luceti. He has not felt this exposed since he was emotionally compromised on the Enterprise...and he was ashamed then too. Spock abruptly stands once more and stalks towards the desk. In a fit of anger he slams both fists down on either side of the journal... unknowingly turning it on. The wood splinters cut into his hands, but he does not feel it. The frustration has built into a blinding rage and he manages to shout in Vulcan...]
Nam-tor nash-veh sasu t’ek’kayik sut!
[Then he picks up the bed-side bureau and throws it out the window making a fantastic display of shattered glass and the deafening silence that follows the explosion of sound....
Spock stands amid the mess and just breaths...]
Spock had woken up this morning and knew he was alone in the house....his Captain was gone. And he knew that he had been taken... and Spock could feel that Captain Kirk was in pain...wherever he was.
Spock wondered at the futility of putting out a community-wide announcement to see if anyone had further information on Kirk's whereabouts. Spock was also rather disinclined to leave his house considering the damage he had inflicted during the bout of amnesia... he had not left the house in approximately 3.6 days. What if he had met someone he had 'assaulted'?
Spock puts his head down at that thought...he can recall his father's lectures on privacy and using telepathy on psy-null beings...these offenses were a severe violation and punishable in Vulcan society. If his home-planet still existed he would be outcast! The crimes he committed! It only proved that as a Vulcan, he was.... a poor example.
Spock abruptly gets up and starts to pace through the room. His meditation lately has left much to be desired, though it did resolve a rather significant issue. The link that he had forc...established with Mister Lupin was familial in nature and fairly easy to control. Lupin would not have to be burdened with this as long as Spock was able to keep his shields in place.
But the meditation itself? The effects from the physical contact had left Spock at mental loose ends. The memories and emotional transference...well, it left him emotionally compromised, and the nature of the contact made it rather difficult to resolve.
Spock's pacing slowed as he considered the other encounters he had...he was a disgrace... the things that happened, the beings he took advantage of... and he will never be able to look at the couch the same again.
He put his head in his hands and sat back down on the bed...there had to be a logical resolution to this...perhaps he needed, as they say, a 'change in scenery'. He looks up and glares a little at the journal. His frustration levels begin to rise once more.
.....everything....everything about Spock has been 'unraveling' since landing in Luceti. He has not felt this exposed since he was emotionally compromised on the Enterprise...and he was ashamed then too. Spock abruptly stands once more and stalks towards the desk. In a fit of anger he slams both fists down on either side of the journal... unknowingly turning it on. The wood splinters cut into his hands, but he does not feel it. The frustration has built into a blinding rage and he manages to shout in Vulcan...]
Nam-tor nash-veh sasu t’ek’kayik sut!
[Then he picks up the bed-side bureau and throws it out the window making a fantastic display of shattered glass and the deafening silence that follows the explosion of sound....
Spock stands amid the mess and just breaths...]
no subject
It would seem that this is a process that I am unable to start on my own... can you help?
no subject
[Luke closes his eyes and concentrates, trying to make rain fall...but it'd be up to Spock if that would happen]
no subject
Spock's stance wavers a bit as he looses balance and kneels on the glassy sand.
Incidentally, that is when the first drop of hits the ground. ]
no subject
Good!
no subject
The image around them suddenly starts to blur as connection is slowly lost.
Luke and Spock are once more in the kitchen... Spock lifts a hand to his own face only to discover the tears that are streaming there...
no subject
Spock, are you alright? Did that help?
no subject
[Spock leaned forward somewhat with his head tilted downwards... crying....it is a rather curious action for sure and Spock was not used to it. However...it felt as though something was 'letting go' in a positive sense.]
no subject
[Luke sits back in his chair and watches, pondering]
no subject
How...how do humans handle this emotion?
no subject
[Luke shrugs]
Being around people you like, forming bonds, that's what I'd do. Accept that you are sad, and then let it go.
no subject
[From behind Spock can be seen wiping his eyes with his shirt sleeve.]
Perhaps though it would be best if I were left alone at this juncture...
Would you be amenable... do meet at a later date to meditate once more?
[Spock... was evading. Getting a Vulcan to talk about their feelings was...well... it might be easier to squeeze liquid out of a rock.]
no subject
[Luke rises and holds out a handkerchief]
Use this.
[At the request, the Jedi nodded]
Of course. I'll do it as often as you like. Though, until you're feeling better, regular treatment would be advisable. And do not isolate yourself in the house. That will only make it worse, my friend.
reaction and then maybe fad to black perhaps?
Spock shifted slightly and accepted the handkerchief to wipe his eyes.]
Your logic is sound... I will contact you shortly regarding a meditation time.
I...I thank thee Luke.