My Kingdom for a Jane

[spohkh]

'Maybe you can be friends?' Spock scoffs at the very thought as he all but stalks through the halls, taking in every detail as ensigns do their best to avoid him. After their relationship came to a natural conclusion, him and Uhura stayed friends of sorts, though Spock had come to avoid everyone more than he usually did, though he would deny it if asked. Though above all, and for reasons beyond all his understanding, it was his Captain's presence that he could bear the least. For now the Vulcan stayed in the labs, taking advantage of the quiet while the Enterprise patrolled an empty sector of space.

Comments

[spohkh]

"I am neither a possession nor missing, as you can see, I am right here." Now he's just being sulky, but he'll never admit it.

"Lieutenant Sulu found a medical compound in a species of plant he procured from his last planetary visit. I am attempting to prove his claim."

He quirks an eyebrow at Jane, waiting for ... something. He's not going to start, so you better be ready to do so.

[punch_it]

That is the biggest load of sarcasm. You've just reached your quota today, Mister Spock. Jane bends down to look at the plant he was, okay not poking, but totally poking at.

"Shouldn't Bones or Chapel be working on this then?"

[spohkh]

"It's a specific science to be able to identify and extract a compound from an uncatalogued species. As Chief of Science, it is my job, not Doctor McCoy's."

Had he been human, he probably would have rolled his eyes.

"Again I must ask, is there anything I can do for you Captain? I am uncertain as to your purpose here."

[punch_it]

"It's my job as Chief Morale Booster to drag you out of here and get some proverbial sunlight." Jane stares at him for a moment. "Did you think I wouldn't notice you've been avoiding anything with sentience since you broke it off with Uhura?"

Or mostly been avoiding her.

[spohkh]

He levels a stare at her... way to hit the nail on the head Jane.

"I was unaware of your new station, and I have not been avoiding you, I have merely been busy."

He shifts, as though unsure. "And I hardly see how my relationship status is any of your business Captain."

[punch_it]

"If you'd been on the Bridge for more than ten minutes, maybe you would have heard the teary-eyed speech I gave while accepting it."

Jane arches a brow, and maybe it's a little mocking, but hey, she's been working on perfecting that level of 'bitch, are you serious?' expression Spock was gifted with from birth, but now is absolutely the appropriate time to utilize it to it's greatest effect.

"As your Captain, it really isn't, but as both of your friend...Spock, I get that you're private, and not the greatest at sharing emotions, but damn, even Bones has commented that you're not yourself lately."

[spohkh]

He eyes Jane for what seems like a long time before he finally speaks.

"You are correct in that I am a private being, it is not easy to reveal the difficulties I have been experiencing since ending the relationship with Lieutenant Uhura."

He hesitates... "I am unsure how to come to terms with what I'm feeling."

[punch_it]

"Find me someone who is. Feelings are messy and complicated, and they're meant to be that way." Jane slides a chair over with the top of her foot and sits down on it. "They're what motivates you. They keep you going. It's when you stop feeling and give up that you know you've got a real problem." Come find rock bottom with her Spock, she's seen it one too many times now.

It straight fucks you up.

Jane leans forward and rests her arms on her knees.

"I'd suggest therapy, but I'm not a hypocrite." She grins crookedly and shrugs one shoulder. If Command had there way, she'd still be locked up in a room somewhere talking about her repressed mommy issues.

[spohkh]

Spock stares down at his hands, refusing to look at Jane.

"Nyota is very perceptive, so much so that she did not even appear upset when she ended our relationship. She had made a suggestion to me that I am still attempting to process."
His hands clench as embarrassment sweeps through him. He's grown weak, he should not be showing such blatant emotion, he should have more control over himself.

Then again, he's never been this conflicted in his entire life, and that's saying something.

[punch_it]

"I'd say she's creepy, but I legitimately don't want to fear for my life so I'm going to agree with you instead and say she usually is."

She's the kind of terrifying that makes Jane regret numerous life choices on way too many occasions.

[spohkh]

"Indeed."

"She informed me that I was distracted, and interested in another. That our relationship was a farce because it was not her that I desired. At the time, I honestly did not know what she meant."

[punch_it]

"Huh." When Spock emotes, he goes in extremes doesn't he? Admittedly he goes into it with a lot more forethought but still, admitting to having complex feelings is a big step from Vulcans have no emotions. "And now?"

[spohkh]

Spock actually hesitates. "And now I find myself unsure as to what the proceeding actions should be."

The Vulcan is quiet, attempting to avoid the actual subject of the conversation.

[punch_it]

"You are so fucking mad about that, aren't you?" Jane spreads her hands out in front of her. "You know what I would do in times like this, but you're not me and that's why we make such a good team."

She'd love to give him less shitty advice but she doesn't have an enormous amount of information to work with here. She's going to have to either wait him out or leave him to whatever thought has got Spock twisted in knots like this.

[spohkh]

His eyes flick to Jane.
"I will not deny that it is frustrating, although you will not be pleased either to find out that one option I was considering is tendering my resignation."

He waits for the fall-out of THAT little bombshell.

[punch_it]

Jane jerks upright so fast her chair wobbles. Her eyes widen and then narrow as she grapples for firm footing when he just shot her out an airlock.

"Excuse me?"

[spohkh]

"I believe you understood what I said."

Spock shifts, looking almost nervous. "There is another option, but I do not know if it is proper one."

[punch_it]

"Spock, what makes you think leaving is a proper option?" It isn't any kind of option at all. Throw her a lifeline here, she is scared shitless right now.

[spohkh]

"That entirely depends on the impropriety of my request."

Spock shuffles, as though nervous. "I wish to share a meal with you."

He said that right, right? Right.

Dammit.

[punch_it]

Jane blinks. "...Fantastic, we've both got Beta shift off. We can meet up then."

No one is going to think its weird that they're eating together. It might even be considered healthy to be seen socializing during their free time.

[spohkh]

Spock actually clears his throat. "I would prefer if we shared this meal in private. I believe human social constructs refer to this as a date, if you are amenable."

[punch_it]

He hadn't lied. Why would she even have considered he would be overreacting. Her brain shrieks to a halt and for a moment all Jane can do is blink owlishly at him.

"...Spock?"

[spohkh]

Spock quirks an eyebrow.

"...Captain?"
He couldn't help the pit of nervousness that started to well in his stomach, waiting for her rejection. This is why he considered a transfer. He was improper to 'date' one's Captain, or have feelings for them. But here he was...

...waiting.

[punch_it]

"...you realize there are forms we'll need to fill out first, right?" That isn't wrong but she is absolutely stalling to try and regain her footing and not just immediately blurt out 'yes'. He deserves the same kind of consideration from her that he gave this situation.

No matter how it makes her stomach flutter.